Positive Cancer

Generally when I go to the gym I run into the same bunch of people. Some know I have metastatic cancer, while others are oblivious mostly because I look fairly healthy. You would think the one’s that are aware of my sickness would be tactful and understanding, but often the opposite is true. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

One friend often says “Sure you’re sick. Let me see your Cancer club membership,” to which I reply “I bet you’ve never been outbenched by a guy whose eligible for a handicap sticker.” This usually ilicits a laugh and a crass reply which I won’t repeat. It’s great to be able to joke about Cancer, and its very positive for me. Friends joke about many things, and in my case, my illness is one of them. Friends being normal around me seems strange;it seems strange that they wouldn’t joke around like they used to about every personal aspect of my life.

I just wanted everyone to know that having friends joke about your Cancer is okay, about your situation is okay. Usually those friends are the one’s that will be there for you when you need something, the one’s who understand your situation well enough to joke about it when your feeling okay, and deal with it when your not. Sure someone might think their strange, making light of your situation, but like the title says, Strange is Normal, at least to me.

Stay Positive, keep your mindset positive and surround yourself with positive people. Positive Cancer is all about being normal with yourself and others, even if normal is different. Besides who wouldn’t want to outbench a healthy person and then gloat about his constant battle with Cancer?

Cancer brings many different physical and psychological challenges including a feeling of isolation from both others and your previous life. Whether your actions or the actions of your friends has caused this situation it should be said that you are not alone, and that there are others who have gone or will go through the same feeling of being alone. By virtue of our Cancer, we are not alone. You are not alone.

Sometimes your isolation comes due to a friend’s inability to understand your situation and I tend to go against common thinking that it may be your friend’s who are having a hard time dealing with your Cancer. I have said it many times, never forget that you are dealing with Cancer, and you’re friends, you’re true friends will be there for you. The others, the one’s that “couldn’t cope” are just a negative influence on you and you shouldn’t spend anytime thinking about them. This situation of losing friends whether real or perceived still leaves a void in your life, one which can cause you to feel even more isolated from others.

There are times when you ill, genuinely sick and unable to interact with others and this too can cause loneliness and isolation. It is hard not to think about your friends, or loved one’s having fun while you are vomiting into the toilet for the eighth time in an hour, and it’s equally hard not to feel like nobody understands what you are going through. Again by virtue of Cancer, there are thousands of people who understand what is happening, and each one of them has had the same feelings at some point in their life.

If you feel alone, isolated from friends and family, you have to understand that the next best people to talk with are people who have gone through what you are dealing with. Positive Cancer allows me to talk to so many others who are dealing with Cancer, and through that it allows me to feel connected and in touch with people who stand united in the basic goal of fighting Cancer. It’s a powerful connection, one which should be used to banish your loneliness and instead light the fires of companionship, and camaraderie. Cancer takes so much from our lives; in our struggle it gives us each other.

In Part two I will talk about how loneliness affects those we love, and how isolated they feel having to take on the caregiver roll.

It’s hard enough having Cancer, but as anyone who has kids, and for those that don’t but are susceptible to colds, flues and infections knows it sucks getting a cold. I can tell you I never get crankier then when I get colds, and so that’s why I thought I would talk a little about walking on a treadmill.

I like to walk the treadmill, at first it was just for the sake of effort, and then as a way of recouping my cardio, and now as a precursor to any running I might do. I am completely for doing exercise, and the treadmill was a great help to stabilizing my weight loss and allowing me to fight colds and other infections.

At first thought it would seem that doing more exercise would hurt my ability to gain weight but walking the treadmill had a great side effect: hunger. Not my usual stunted hunger, but my muscles wanted nutrients hunger, and so I ate and ate and started gaining weight. The weight gain helped deal with colds but even more so the stamina I got made colds definitely, and I will say again, definitely seem less severe and I was better able to handle them.

Now consulting a doctor is a must before beginning any exercise, and what I have done may not be for you. With that in mind, walking gave me more energy, more ability to fight colds, made the colds seem less powerful, and even triggered endorphins which tend to fight “depression.” Sure the occasional cold, or flu knocks me out for a couple of weeks, but I can only imagine how much worse they would be or how much longer my recuperation would take if I did not keep to my walking routine. Walking treadmill took some time to build up, but now I can go for an hour, five days a week, and I couldn’t be happier with the results. If the doctor says yes, give it a try.